I have recently been getting into pleasure activism, thanks to the wonderful book of that name by adrienne marie brown. Pleasure activism is about cultivating a deeply fulfilling life so that we, as humans, can better serve the world without draining or denying ourselves the joy of existence.

It feels extremely relevant to sex work, a job which is all about satisfying desires. As a sex worker, I have been tasked with pleasing myself and others at the same time–which can be difficult. Sex work is not inherently about pleasing ourselves as sex workers, but doing what is needed to satisfy the client or audience, which often means performing for others- a role which can make this line of work emotionally and physically exhausting.

We often lose ourselves in the work and forget we should be operating from a spiritual and emotional place in the midst of performance and work. Sex work is just that -work- which isn't inherently enjoyable, but we can all bring more pleasure into our lives, despite the things we do to make money and survive. Sex work has many benefits that can make it a highly pleasurable experience if a sex worker is attuned to their needs, but many forget to show themselves the same attention they do their clients.

From what I've observed in the industry with the widespread occurrence of burnout and being a workaholic, I believe sex workers could benefit from a lesson in pleasure activism. As much as we are getting others off, we need to be getting ourselves off. We need not forget to take care of ourselves first, to protect ourselves from burnout and the undervaluing of our talents and gifts. We cannot do our job to the fullest extent and bring as much healing goodness into the world if we are not working on our own healing. It can be hard to focus on ourselves when clients are always demanding our attention, but it is essential, so we don't deplete ourselves of precious energy and passion.

Being a sex worker is sacred because we hold other people's pleasure experiences in our hands, which is not an easy or light thing. In this harsh world in which we are all oppressed in some way, we have been taught to ignore or abuse our pleasure bodies. We are taught that our value is in our capacity to produce labor to maintain the system of capitalism, which is so far less than we are meant for.

Especially for women, pleasure has been linked to shame and exploitation, and we have accepted our own suffering because of it. We have to learn to resist the constraints the current model puts on us enough to respect our value as a human, and not just a worker. I enjoy being a sex worker because I can make people feel good and encourage them to be more aware of their needs and desires outside of their interactions with me. I know I am not the sole source of their pleasure, but I take them coming to me as something special, an opportunity for me to impart a positive message on them of their inherent value and worthiness of pleasure. To bring the world to a better place, we need to start with bringing ourselves the most pleasure and joy possible.

Pleasure is not always sexual, it can mean moving our bodies the way we feel called to, speaking our truths in writing or aloud, or having tactile experiences like smelling flowers and creating art with our hands. Pleasure activism is not hedonism, either; we must do things that bring us pleasure but in the long-term.

Eating lots of sugar may feel good in the moment, but have long-term health consequences which will make us suffer. Dancing, on the other hand, has excellent physical and mental health benefits, and every minute we spend doing it is a minute we spend gaining life, not losing it. We all could benefit from becoming more aware and attentive to our deepest needs, ones we have ignored for far too long, and ones which allow us to live our best lives and be that much closer to reaching our fullest potential.

I am happy whenever I can bring others joy, and I know this is only truly possible in the most profound way if I too am happy. As sex workers, we can't sacrifice our peace for others. I encourage everyone to read up on pleasure activism and move towards a fully awakened existence, rather than a fragmented one defined by social conditioning and constructs.

SeraMoon