MV Relationships is where MV Stars talk about the joys and unique challenges of dating, love, and relationships while being an MV Star and sex worker! This installment features DestinyDiaz, along with her partner Erik, sharing their experiences, insights, and advice!

Tell us a little about your relationship?

Destiny: Erik and I have been together for seven and a half years, and have been in the industry together almost just as long. From the day I met him, I just hated spending any time away from him. We are very opposite in some ways that make working with him really easy because he doesn't take away my creative control but instead, is super analytical and can do those tedious things that would drive me crazy. But we are also so similar in ways that make life so joyful. We are so supportive of each other, we don't take ourselves or life too seriously.

Erik: She summed it up pretty well, but it's crazy how people who are so different in their general ways of being can also be so alike when it comes to things like goals, morals, ethics, etc. She's almost as right brain as possible, and I'm near as left brain as possible, but it works surprisingly well.

In previous interviews, Destiny shared this story about how she took sexy pictures for Erik, and he was the one who introduced her to webcamming. Did you both start working together in front of the camera right away?

Destiny: Well we had fucked around on Chatroulette and Omegle together while we were waiting for my application to process for the first site I signed up with. It was something I was already used to, but for him, it was new. I think anyone who isn't used to being in front of the camera is a little intimidating at first, but he was always willing to be my stunt cock for gold shows, vids, and pictures."

Erik: Yes, it was pretty early on that I became involved. I don't know how much work you could credit me with, but I was a frequent stand-in hahaha.

It's wonderful you two got in it together, in a scenario where a cam model is single and dating what advice you would give them? (Or their new partners who might not understand the separation between sex, emotions, real life, and fantasies.)

Erik: You may be the only person that your significant other is attracted to, but you're not the only person that is -attractive-. And that if your partner finds someone else attractive, it doesn't mean that you're not. As a webcam model or MV Star, this isn't a huge deal, because they usually aren't working with other people. But I still think it's a healthy way of thinking of things, even for those who aren't in sex work at all. It creates a more realistic environment where you are less likely to torture yourself with jealousy.

But to get back to the question, and with advice that I think more people will be able to swallow, think of it like this: Their body and/or personality is so great that they're willing to pay to experience what your girlfriend/boyfriend shares with you for free. Their presence in your partner's cam room in nothing but complementary. There is nothing to be territorial about."

What do you two like to do, either alone or together, when you're not working?

Destiny: I love spending time with my little, being loud and goofy with him is a perfect way to end a productive day. I also love watching my favorite YouTubers–that's my "me time" thing. But all of my other hobbies are tied to my career, which I'm so grateful for.

Erik: I have a philosophy that one should continue to improve their body, and mind for as long as they can do so. And what that means is obviously a grey zone. But focusing on at least one aspect of both is a great start. So for me, much of my day is focused on bodybuilding/powerlifting and the nutrition that goes along with those. And for my mind, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't read or listen to something in the scientific realm, and I also produce music (hip hop, EDM, pop, RnB, etc.). I feel it's a well-rounded group of things that keep my mind, and body feeling fresh. And whatever word you want to attach to the amazing things music can do for you, we'll say emotional well being. Outside of that, I'm a huge cuddler haha. If I'm around Destiny or my son, it's either hugs, or cuddling watching TV, or a movie.

Destiny, you mentioned Erik is more analytical, and you are more creative, are tasks delegated based on both of your strengths? What duties do you both have when it comes to running your business?

Destiny: Yeah, so usually vid concepts, shoot themes, scripts, outfits, and the majority of camming is me. I do all of the editing and graphic designing, booking, and traveling plans. We both do a lot of promotion. I manage the orders, package things, he mails them and checks the PO Box. I run all of my socials, I swipe on Tinder and Erik helps relay the FAQ for that content.

Erik: Hey hey hey, I definitely contribute to vid concepts... based on my own perversions! Hahah. And yes, we both share promotion responsibilities, which is dope because we both have different strategies. I make sure the camera batteries are charged, the lighting is set up, the room or area is straightened up, and then put away all the equipment so she can get to editing faster. I also send in A LOT of DMCA reports.

Destiny: Aww and a few times he had kept me company when it was slow on cam, through Facebook chat notifications that pop on my main screen he'd get conversations going–which helped keep me on longer. But usually when I'm on cam, he is cleaning up, and I appreciate it so much because I can actually relax when I get offline no matter how it went.

What challenges have you experienced while dating and being an industry couple? What has been the hardest part? Do you think being in a relationship has ever stopped you from doing other things you desired in the industry?

Destiny: It's not like Erik ever stopped me from doing things, but I was reluctant to travel (for conventions, etc.) because I didn't like being away from him. We could travel together, but for us, I think it's best that our family trips stay separate from work trips. I'm so grateful that Erik respects my want to travel for work and never makes me feel guilty for leaving, even if I'm feeling it.He is always cheering me on back home through texts, and voice memos.

And the only other thing I can think of is that I'm kind of hard on him when it comes to getting the right shot, but that's nothing personal, we just don't share the same vision, and I can get a bit cranky haha, I'm working on it."

Erik: I never really had a desire to be in the mainstream industry. If you enjoy it, all the respect, and power to you. But ironically, I don't enjoy sex being a "job." In the beginning, when we tried to set specifical schedules to cam together, and film together, I feel that it hurt our personal sex life. Part of it was working when you weren't necessarily turned on at that time, and on the flip side of that, when you did have free time, you were "spent" from working earlier so again you might not be in the mood.

I think we've really found the balance since then of either saying "Hey, I'm horny. Do you want to film?" or at least "We should film this soon, let me know when you're feeling it." That has really been the only problem I can remember. I am incredibly open-minded, possibly to a fault, so nothing else about this has ever been an issue. If anything, it's been easy. It's a turn-on just to see how many people glorify her and her personality."

For the last year, you have been consistently putting out new content with new co-stars in your Tinder Tales and Hoe Diaries series. How did you get into that? What type of boundaries did you discuss beforehand? And Destiny was it strange or awkward hooking up with someone other than Erik?

Destiny: Well, people forget that one of my most sold videos is a threesome video from 2015, so we had dabbled in having another partner before. We were always trying new things when we first started dating, like swinging and sharing, watching people, people watching us. When it came to the Tinder and Hoe series specifically, the intention was to find one partner, but then we decided multiple. As far as the meetings and hookups being awkward, yes sometimes, but that makes comfortable offline sex with Erik even better.

Erik: I think our first off-camera threesome within the first 3ish months of us dating. So, I've never had any boundary issues in our time together. But we have a lot of trust in our relationship, and I'm not worried about her leaving me or anything. 

Erik, you probably get asked this a lot, but do you ever get jealous? Do you two have an open relationship?

Erik: I've always thought of sex as the most fun and exciting thing in life. When I was young, I had some jealousy issues, but I refused to let something that was just in my head get in the way of a life of fun. So I was honest with myself and realized it was more about me not being happy with myself and not about anybody else doing anything wrong. It wasn't an easy journey, but I'm happy I went through it.

We don't have an open relationship. She has shared me but realized that it wasn't for her and more so something she'd rather keep a fantasy. And that's fine with me. It's not for everyone. There are many insecurities or fears I have in life in general. I can think about them logically all day, and it still might not help. Public speaking, for example. What's the worst that could happen? Someone heckling? Exactly.Virtually no actual risk but it still petrifies me.

Insecurity can be a very crippling feeling, and can be baggage you bring with you from past relationships, and can ruin current relationships. My intentions are not to shame those who can't get past it, but just to help those who are looking to change. In the end, it worked out exactly as I could have hoped. Every day is a new adventure, and I'm more confident with myself than I've ever been to."

Destiny, What do you look for, and what do you find attractive in a partner and/or a date when you are swiping around on Tinder?

Destiny: I'll be honest, I didn't really think I had a type before but now that I'm swiping–I definitely realize that I do. I like tall guys. I like chin straps, but that's not a deal breaker hahaha, and I like wit. It's fun when a dudes personality is vibing with mine in the video, and they aren't too shy to talk and banter with me.

DestinyDiaz