Ah poor you. You don't have a sweetheart to spoil on Valentine's Day. Don't worry, I got this covered! I'll be your Valentine's Day sweetheart. You can buy Me the flowers, chocolates, and gifts. However, I'm not like any Valentine's Day sweetheart you've had in the past. A stuffed **** a box of chocolates you got from the Silly Stuff store, just won't do.