You know how I feel about undisciplined pups. I won’t abide them. So every time I take on a new pet, I put him through my own little version of obedience school. And lucky you, school is in session today. For our first lesson, we’re going to focus on deference and self-control. The rules are simple—I tell you what to do, and you do it—but once we get started you’ll see that simple does not mean easy. But my pup wants to excel, doesn’t he? He wants to please his Mistress. So you’re going to try your very hardest. Now let’s get started.