I come home from a party, all dressed up in high heels and a little dress that shows off my ass and my tits. Everything which I've been consuming has given me terrible heartburn though. I pour myself a glass of water and drop a few Alka Seltzer tablets into the glass and listen to it fizz and bubble. Then I chug down all the water and realise I have accidentally given myself a whole lot of gas. I let rip with several burps, even though it isn't very ladylike.