I picked up a pair of jeans at a local thrift store. I didn't bother to try them on in the store, but figured they'd fit.  I took them home and put them on. I'm so happy to see that they fit like a glove. I'm so distracted by how much I like them that I don't even notice the fart that escapes before it's too late. Oops! That one came out of nowhere. I continue to enjoy my new jeans and suddenly another fart pops out. What is going on? One after another I am doubled over as fart after fart squeaks out of my ass. I can't seem to make it stop! It must be these new jeans! Are they cursed? I try to peel to take them off, but the zipper appears to be stuck. I then try to peel them off, but it's no use. The harder I try the more I fart. I just want it to stop! I'm never buying jeans from a thrift store ever again!