Don’t you think it’s funny how different your life is to mine? Whilst you’re at home jerking to humiliation porn like a prize loser, let me tell you what I’ll be up to. I’m going to my friend’s party. It’s not the kind of party you would ever get invited to. It’s a hot tub party with two rules. 1. Single people only 2. Bring your hottest friend as your +1 I’ll tell you about what happened last time we had a party like this and what I’m excited about tonight. It’s going to get steamy. I’ll also talk about how it compares to what you’re doing tonight hahaha.