I filmed this clip in the garage because the tool metaphor is too amusing to pass up. Basically anything big and long reminds me of Alpha, while little, tiny tools remind me of your shrimp dick. The size discrepancy makes me laugh every time I think about it. Did you get that, loser? Your dick is a JOKE. Women hate small dicks, which is why you're perpetually single and always stroking with two fingers. Eww. Just the notion of a small dick is nauseating to me... and you have one attached to your body! Sucks to be you!
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