Happy new year, my royal subjects! 2024 looks set to be an amazing year for our Queendom. I will be going away on a royal loser-funded trip, and of course, this month marks a truly special occasion – the birthday of your Queen, the day I bestowed meaning into your lives. I know it’s cold and dark outside, but I expect you to work harder than ever to mark this truly remarkable occasion. There will of course be royal celebrations and needless to say, none of you peasants will be invited. I do, however, expect each and every one of you to suffer and sacrifice harder than ever for your Queen this month. Don’t let me down, losers.
