Things are getting pretty serious between you and porn, huh? Dating was hard for you. Probably so stressful and embarrassing; I can't imagine you have great social skills, what with all the hours of pumping and gooning and all. Your ability to hold a conversation has probably atrophied at this point. But that's what makes porn so great, right? No dinner reservations, no choosing what movie to go to, you just get to pump your fucking brains out! Porn doesn't judge you. Porn doesn't nag you. Sure, after a hard day it might be nice to be able to talk to someone about it, but why process your feelings when you could just stroke yourself into oblivion?! Who needs coping skills when you have PORN?! This IS your coping skill. Porn IS your girlfriend. Maladaptive? Maybe. Controlling? Definitely. But you love how controlling and possessive porn is. None of your other girlfriends were like this because they probably didn't actually care about you. But you love being isolated with porn. No more traditional expectations like marriage. With porn, you get to be hopeless and helpless. The only thing porn demands is that you get to rock fucking bottom.
