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I am a student of yours who is failing your class. It seems that I am more focused on my booming social life than I am my studies, and so you have been failing me. But secretly, I haven’t been worried. I’ve been noticing you looking at me, getting flush when you see me pass by, and being completely aroused by me. I know you want me, and that you would likely do ANYTHING for a chance with me, and with the semester coming to an end, I need to secure my A+, and I know just how to get you to give it to me!