You wake up to find a voicemail left by your mean, bratty, way-out-of-your-league girlfriend and, shocker! She's dumping you. She's ready to give you a piece of her mind, about how ugly you are, how incompetent of a lover you are, how tiny your penis is and how she's going to tell everyone in town...but she also suspects that you secretly LIKE being humiliated and rejected. She proposes to keep you around as her pathetic slave bitch, and you just can't wait to return her call! The listener is assumed to be a man with a (small) penis.