Your incredible transformation has been a marvel to behold. You used to be all slim, muscular, and athletic, but now? You're a gloriously flabby, wonderfully round testament to our shared passion. It's like you swapped your gym membership for a competitive eating circuit. Your athlete's appetite, paired with your new sedentary lifestyle, has caused you to swell like a lard-filled balloon. Something tells me, my dear hoglet, that you couldn't be happier with your newfound freedom to eat as you please. Keep shoveling in greasy, fattening fast food and sugary, carb-loaded sweets, fat boy; the newfound weight looks good on you.