This morning began with the most bizarre sneeze ever—each one sounding exactly like a bicycle horn. As the hours pass, it’s only getting louder and more ridiculous, like a clown car has taken up residence in my sinuses. I’ve tried every trick in the book, but nothing can stop the high-pitched honk that erupts with every sneeze. Now I’m left wondering how on earth I’m supposed to go on my date tonight without sounding like the opening act at a circus. Does anyone know a cure for this relentless honker sneezing?