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Good morning, you are just the person I wanted to talk to. You are surprised at first as you are one of the most loyal church goers. You're always volunteering, assisting in any way you can and anyone would think you're practically sin-less. However, no one is without sin, as you know from scriptures. Sin is common and even natural. You sin and repent. I could say those that abstain from sin as hard as you, might have even more to hide. That's why it's of absolute importance for you to give into lust once in a while. Sin, repent & be forgive and sin again, you're only human after all...