Oh, Santa, just look at you. I’ve really gone and fattened you up this year, haven’t I? That poor suit can barely handle how massive your belly’s gotten—so big, soft, and obscenely round. You’ve been such a greedy, gluttonous hog for your Mrs. Claus, gobbling up every treat I made without hesitation. Every pie, every tray of cookies, every rich midnight snack straight into that insatiable mouth of yours. Now? You’re heavy, slow, and absolutely stuffed, waddling around like the perfect overfed pig that's grown wonderfully plump, just in time for Christmas.