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You’ve been coming to my clinic for weight control. You’ve clearly gone off your diet and gained 35 pounds in a month. I am going to place you under a mandatory hold at my clinic. I will completely control what you consume. You are bound to the bed and fed through a funnel. The tube goes deep down your throat and straight to your stomach! I will ensure that you are eating protein-rich, fiber-rich, and FAT-rich meals throughout this process. I am going to put in weight-gain powder for good measure, too. I will not release you from my clinic until you weigh 600 pounds. Did you think you were going to lose weight here? Absolutely not. I am going to make you so fat that you cannot move on your own. Then you will be a ward of my clinic and my staff. My nurses have been instructed to feed you every two hours. Enjoy the last moments of mobility and freedom before you are my bed-bound pig.