I can't believe that my boyfriend broke up with me - he said my ass was TOO big! I spend the week with my friend, eat everything in his pantry and go through the stages of grief as I try to overcome this insane breakup. What do you mean my ass is too fat? I didn't realize that was even possible! However, now that I've eaten my friend out of house and home, I've overstayed my welcome and it's time to leave. Except it seems that his door shrunk or something because my ass gets stuck as Im trying to make my exit. I struggle and slam into the door frame, nearly accepting defeat. Is my ass really too big?
