Your sweet girlfriend can’t come to the phone right now. She doesn’t have control of her body. She gave it over to me so that I can do what she was too kind to do without demonic intervention: break your worthless heart. And it truly is worthless. She never cared about you. She only agreed to go out with you out of pity, and since then her opinion of you has fallen lower and lower…right to the very bottom. Are you ready to hear the truth? If not, too bad. My deal with your girlfriend was to tell you everything.