Every year you let Valentine's Day sneak up on you; leaving your wife with a last minute, cheap, impersonal gift that you pick up from a corner store on your way home from work. That's not going to fly anymore, dummy. I'm here to whip you into shape, because right now? you're a pathetic mess of a man who is *this* close to being ignored and shunned by EVERY woman you cross paths with. Bend over- I've brought you a special Valentine's gift; a bouquet of roses! My bouquet is not your typical bunch of blooms- it's made of the finest leather. This bouquet is gunna beat your ass and your greedy, self serving boner until My lesson gets through your thick skull and into your tiny beta brain. Take your punishment like a good little boy, learn your lesson and DO BETTER! 3
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