I’ve been your lawyer for a long time, and I’ve never steered you wrong. I’ve been your main source of advice, both legal and personal, and let’s be real... I’ve also stood in as the most significant woman in your life since your wife left you. It’s an awkward subject, but there’s something important we need to discuss today; your will. I know it’s stressful, so take a sniff from this little bottle and let me help you relax. Now, your offspring have abandoned you, and there are no prospects on the romantic front. The answer is clear. You are going to sign over all your assets, all your money, everything to me. Now sign on the dotted line...