You’ve gotten so big. I know I’ve compared you to a pig, with your potbelly and your double chin, not to mention the sloppy way you eat, and the term certainly fits. But now that you’ve passed the point of overweight and settled firmly into the realm of full-on obese, sometimes I look at you and I see a cow rather than a pig. Especially when you get down on all fours and gravity takes its toll. Your belly hangs almost to the ground, your manboobs look like real tits…and just like a true cow, I could even milk you if I wanted to. Would you like that, fatty? Would you let me milk you just like a fat heifer?